


Broken Spoke

by houxvertetbruyere



Category: Star Trek
Genre: Amnesia, Fluff and Angst, Grief, Insecurity, M/M, Multi, Sometimes Bones Gets To Be The Vulnerable One, Spock is a good husband, Triumvirate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-19
Updated: 2020-10-19
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:21:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27094966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/houxvertetbruyere/pseuds/houxvertetbruyere
Summary: Leonard can’t do a damn thing about the fact that Jim doesn’t seem to remember the last four years of his life. Of THEIR lives.Trektober Day 18 - Amnesia
Relationships: James T. Kirk/Leonard "Bones" McCoy/Spock, Leonard "Bones" McCoy/Spock
Comments: 6
Kudos: 82
Collections: Trektober 2020





	Broken Spoke

Jim’s been back for a week but Leonard isn’t as relieved as he maybe should be. The damage done to Jim by whatever poison the people of Gideon VII made him drink might be permanent. Leonard tried his best to remove the toxins from Jim’s system but- well, they just hadn’t rescued him in time.

That was the crux of it. 

And Leonard can’t do a damn thing about the fact that Jim doesn’t seem to remember the last four years of his life. Of _their_ lives.

He’s hiding out on the observation deck trying desperately to ignore his burning eyes when the third in their little love triangle finds him.

Spock comes to stand behind him in that freaky silent way of his. He rests a long cool hand on Leonard’s shoulder. Immediately he feels more calm and collected. 

Leonard spins the wedding band on his finger and stares unseeing at the stars.

“Thought I told you to stop doin’ that.”

“By ‘that’ I presume you mean my thoughts flowing to yours? You know I cannot completely shield myself from you- our bond keeps us in tune with each other at all times.”

Leonard hums.

“I meant sneakin’ up on me.”

Spock sighs. Leonard tries to remember that Spock is grieving Jim’s four year memory loss, too. It’s harder than it ought to be.

“Leonard, we have not lost him. In fact, we are more fortunate than many bodmates would be in the same circumstances. There are two of us to share our memories with the captain. I believe he will benefit from our perspe-”

“Same circumstances? You mean to tell me other bondmates have been in the _same circumstances_ Spock? Other bondmates have lost their captain for three weeks and found him withered up and delirious in a dank cell? They’ve performed on him for 18 hours straight and in the end still weren’t able to fix the damage- still got the last _four years_ erased from his memory!?

Spock flinches but doesn’t pull away. Leonard feels a shared grief pulse between them but he’s angry, there’s a loss that’s all his own here and Spock knows it.

“You don’t know how this feels- you two were a couple in his last memory but I was just a-” Leonard gulps. 

“He doesn’t remember our first date with the three of us, our first kiss, three _years_ of fallin’ in love- I don’t- what if he never-” Leonard’s voice breaks on the last word. He tries to rub his stinging eyes with the heels of his hands and- God, he’s crying.

Of course Spock is there to catch him. He’s wrapping his long arms around Leonard before he can even register that he’s swaying.

“Ashayam,” Spock speaks into his mind. “I am with you. Trust in me. Trust in our bond. I will not let him forget how we grew to bond with you. When he is well enough we will link and he will see the love that is between us all. It is strong enough to withstand this.”

Leonard gets his feet back under him as waves of comfort flow from their bond. God he’s so, so tired.

“You should know,” Spock murmurs aloud, “Jim has wanted you since long before we approached you to discuss the matter. He attempted to hide it from me in the beginning of our coupling but his love for you was always like a third presence. He will not reject you, ashayam. Trust me.”

Leonard does trust Spock, of course he does. But the fear won’t disappear that easily. He’d had nothing when he met Jim on that shuttle but being with Spock and Jim together he’d had _everything_.

Old insecurities have risen to the surface now and Spock can definitely feel it.

“Will you allow me to take you to our quarters?”

“But Jim-” Leonard protests. Spock is still holding him upright.

“Jim is in the competent hands of Nurse Chapel. He is resting. Right now I would like to be with my husband in our quarters reaffirming our bond.”

Leonard can’t speak for how tight his throat gets at the word _husband_. Spock loves him. They like to act the odd couple but- Spock really loves him. And he’s right. Somehow Leonard just knows Spock is right. Their bond can withstand this. He has to trust in that.


End file.
